I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize
