Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Randomize
