STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Randomize
