Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize