it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Randomize
