ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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