Sry I called you an 8
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize