This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
dude. I can hear the air.
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