Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize
