I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
