Capitaan dildo arrescate!
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Randomize