Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Randomize