he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
