Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize