A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
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