So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
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