normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
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