Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
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