I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
fuck your aforementioned shoe
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Randomize
