I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize