Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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