Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
