I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
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I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
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The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?