But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Randomize
