Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".