Non-Jews are for practice
Come see our sink grown plant.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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