none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
