your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
