An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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