I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
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