And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
I feel great
I just peed on a car
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
Randomize