He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
