I need help removing her.
I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize