You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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