The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize