So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
