She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
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