i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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