i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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