They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
