Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Randomize