Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
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