I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
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Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
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Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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