if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
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