they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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