If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
Small penises have feelings too.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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