You're a womanizer and a bitch.
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
