How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
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