He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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