So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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