i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize